Usually when people tell you that you’re being picky, they’re projecting their insecurities onto you. These often have to do with poor dating habits, lack of boundaries, a history of dubious partners and experiences, a general lack of personal security and misguided ideas about type, compatibility, values etc.
It’s particularly common for certain marginalized groups to be told that they should settle.
1. She’s not a good cook
If a woman’s cooking is so bad that you have a drawer full of take out menus and restaurants on speed-dial, it may be time to correct her. But be sure to do it with a nice approach or she might get upset.
One powerful way to correct her is to tell her you’re picky – but only for valid reasons (not just her looks). This makes you seem both attracted and special to her in a hurry.
3. She’s not a good dancer
If you’re not willing to give a second date because you think they’re not your type, it might be time to reassess what kind of partner you’re looking for. Consider writing down a list of non-negotiable qualities (fun personality, great sense of humor, compassionate heart, etc.).
Telling girls that you are picky is a powerful statement that positions you as someone they can get (if they have the right qualities, of course). But be careful not to sound desperate or demanding.
4. She’s not a good actress
She can’t deliver a line convincingly, does not give good facial expressions and sounds lifeless. She was so awful in Sharknado that I have to question how she is the main star of a major Hollywood movie.
If you are pickingy with your woman, make sure you have valid reasons to be so. If not, you could be causing yourself pain later in your relationship.
5. She’s not a good writer
While she may be a good plotter, her writing is not very good. If she has a hard time explaining how her character got from point A to point B, you might want to consider taking her aside and telling her that she’s not a great writer. This is a powerful way to get her to take you seriously. It’s also very funny.
6. She’s not a good dancer
If a particular trait won’t make you any less happy decades from now, it’s not worth ruling someone out of the equation right away. That’s what non-picky dating looks like (keeping your standards high, of course).
If she doesn’t have good dancing skills, let her know and let her initiate any increase in touching. She might be willing to work on her moves in exchange for your affection.
8. She’s not a good actress
If you find yourself limiting your dating pool to people who share a specific set of non-negotiable qualities, that’s pickiness. If those traits won’t make you unhappy decades from now, it’s worth letting someone new in on the fun. Just be sure to have valid reasons for being picky. This will position you as both attracted and protective. Plus, it will impress her.
9. She’s not a good dancer
If she’s not a good dancer, don’t be afraid to say so. This is a powerful statement that positions you as both someone with high standards and someone she can get.
If you’re picky with your woman, consider writing down a list of the non-negotiable traits (like fun personality, compassionate heart, and treats you well). This can help you avoid being too picky in the future.
10. She’s not a good singer
The concept of being too picky has been used to browbeat women into settling for longer than I can remember. However, the underlying issue behind unhealthy pickiness is fear. People who are too picky are afraid to depend on someone else for fear of being hurt. This fear prevents them from finding a meaningful relationship. A true love can overcome this fear.
